What a goofy day. 

Actually, it probably started last night.  I was a bit concerned because I was running a slight temperature (max of 99.6) and I thought, “Not again.”

I turned the lights out around 10:30 PM and fell asleep pretty quickly.  Being up till 3 AM the night before probably had something to do with that.  I slept well and each time that I got up to use the bathroom (twice), I checked my temperature.  It was hovering right around 99.0.  I’d fall asleep easily and, the next thing you know, it was 10 AM.

So far through today, my temperature has remained below 99.0.  That’s good.  I’ll keep monitoring it to make sure there are no signs of the infection returning.

Based on that little scare, I just took it easy around the house today.  I did run to Kroger to stock up on groceries for the week.  That’s been about it.  I may try to run out for some fun tomorrow–the weather is supposed to be quite nice–mid 40’s.

And speaking of weather, the groundhog was right.  When I went to check my mail this afternoon, there was a robin sitting on my lawn.  Spring is on its way!!

It’s funny.  After six weeks of wandering around in a bathrobe or sweats and t-shirts, putting on jeans and a regular shirt for the first time is odd.  And constrictive.  I wonder if I can modify the dress code at work for my return…  Hmmm…..

This morning I went to work to drop off my return to work form with my boss and I spent just over an hour wandering around saying hi to people.  It was good to see them all again.  I’m ready for the interaction with real people on a regular basis once again.  Sitting in the house alone for this long does get on one’s nerves just a bit.

After wandering through the offices, I went to lunch with a friend to get caught up with her.

Last night was another sleepless night.  I think I was so excited about the freedom from tubes that I just couldn’t shut off my brain.  I started to think about all the things that I can do again, both outside of work and at work, and that just kept me going until about 3 AM.  Ugh.  I hope that excitement is behind me and I can get into a regular sleep pattern once again.

As far as the drainage tube site is concerned, it’s closing up and beginning to heal.  I’ll have to admit that this one seems to be a bit more tender than the first one that was removed for some reason.  I’ll keep an eye on it. 

I’ve also been keeping an eye on my temperature: 98.6.  Let’s hope it stays that way through the weekend and beyond.

I’ll wrap up the day with dinner at the local Mexican restaurant with friends in a short while.

Happy Weekend!

Finally!  For 33 of the last 38 days, I’ve had some additional plumbing coming out of my body.  The surgeon pulled the last drain out of me this afternoon.  Woo-freakin’-hoo!  This will be such a relief.  Now, let’s just keep our fingers crossed that the fluid doesn’t build up again now that the drain is out.

He wanted me to return in a month for a routine follow-up exam.

While there, I did specifically ask him whether or not the undetectable PSA level meant cancer-free, and he said yes.  I also asked about the chance of recurrence.  Given the particulars of my case, he said there’s an 80% chance that I’ll be cancer-free at the 10 year point.  That wasn’t necessarily a surprise to me; I had read the long-term statistics in my research.

Of course, that means there will be a little cloud hovering over me for the rest of my life, but I don’t plan on letting it rain on my parade.  It’s just something that will always be there.

Finally, the surgeon also gave me the green light to return to work next week.

Before heading to the doctor, I had lunch with a friend from work at one of the local watering holes.  (And, yes, I skipped their home-brewed beer.)  It was good to get caught up with him.

This day was spent just doing odds and ends around the house in preparation for the possibility that I’ll return to work next week.  None of it was anything spectacular–just washing linens and other laundry; cleaning bathrooms; and turning my bedroom back into a bedroom rather than a recovery room.

The output volumes for the drain are still pretty flat, so we’ll find out tomorrow whether they’re good enough to pull the drain from my groin.  I hope so.  But I also don’t want another setback, so if it has to stay a while longer, then so be it.

At the beginning of this journey, I spent many nights tossing, turning, and getting very little sleep.  Once I made the decision on the surgeon, the insomnia pretty much went away.  Until last night.

I’m really not sure what happened yesterday.  Perhaps the good news of an undetectable PSA got me fired up and looking forward.  When I went to bed at the usual time, I just couldn’t fall asleep.  I tossed, turned, and finally gave up around 2:00 AM, turning on the TV to distract me for a while.  By 3:30 AM, the lights and I were both out.

I posted yesterday’s post a little earlier than usual just to share the good news as soon as I got it.  I didn’t mention that I ventured out for a short while yesterday afternoon to run to the bank, drop some bills off at the post office, and get a haircut. 

Boy, did I need a haircut.  (Yes, even with as little hair as I have, I still needed one desperately.)

That was the one thing on my pre-surgery checklist that I didn’t get to.  The last time my hair was cut was mid-December.  After nearly two months, it was over my ears and very scruffy on the back of my neck.  I couldn’t stand it any longer.

I feel so much better today because of it.

I had a couple of coworkers stop by for a visit at lunch today.  It was good to see them again and get caught up on some of the happenings in my absence. 

“Great news.  Your PSA was undetectable.”

So that’s how the surgeon started his conversation with me today.  In the excitement of hearing the good news, I didn’t specifically ask him if he would call me cancer-free, but I pretty much would at this point.  Between the post-surgery biopsies of the prostate and the lymph nodes, and now the news of an undetectable PSA, I’d be willing to say with about 99.5% confidence that I’m cancer-free.

That makes today a pretty good day.

I’ll have to do follow-up PSA tests every six months for the first two years, and then yearly after that.

I suspect that I’ll always be wondering whether or not I have cancer going forward.  I guess that’s one of the side effects of having cancer in the first place.

The drainage output remained steady over the weekend: 40, 30, 30, 30, 40, and 30.  So we agreed to keep my appointment for Thursday afternoon and monitor the output between now and then.  With a little bit of luck, the drain will come out Thursday.

I continue to progress with controlling the incontinence, too.  I’m finding that I’m having fewer incidents when I stand (although it does take some effort to prevent them from occurring), and that the volume of the “squirts” seems to be decreasing as well.  Of course, a good sneeze or cough will cause an incident almost all the time, but again, a small incident.

For one of the first times in a long time, I found myself sleeping in way longer than I wanted or expected.

I woke up for my 8:00 AM dose of antibiotics and crawled back into bed after taking them.  Then next thing I know, the clock read 11:10 AM.  Yikes!  I certainly didn’t intend for that to happen, but I guess I needed some extra sleep.  I certainly don’t want to get on THAT schedule the closer I get to returning to work.  (Keeping an optimistic attitude about the drain output volume!)

Speaking of output volume, it’s remained at 30 ml every 12 hours for the last three cycles.  That’s good.  For a while before that, it was creeping back up to 40 ml.  Looking at the bag right now (5:30 PM), I’d guess that the 10:00 PM (or end of Super Bowl) reading will come in at or below 30 ml. 

I’ll hold off sending my readings to the surgeon until after the 10 AM reading tomorrow morning.  That way, he can call me back later in the afternoon and perhaps he’ll have the PSA test results by then.  We’ll see.

I’ll have to admit that it’s much better to have just one drain instead of the two.  It’s a lot easier to sleep and get around the house.  The other thing that really helps is that he removed the original dressing that was over both of the drains.  Not having that any longer feels a lot better, too.  Plus, I don’t have to tape a Ziploc bag over my belly in order to take a shower now.

Well, time to clean up the kitchen after an early dinner in advance of tonight’s Big Game.  I can’t say that I’m rooting for one team over the other, but my Midwestern roots will probably have me pulling more for the Packers than the Steelers.  (Sorry, CX readers!)

Today was a calmer day than yesterday, emotionally.  I accepted the fact that I have to keep this tube coming out of me for a while longer, and have been able to navigate better without trying to rip it out of me as I did yesterday.

I haven’t detected any issues because of the one drain being removed.  The hole seems to be healing nicely already.  The output of the other remains about where it was yesterday and the day before.

It was a snowy day–a good day to curl up with some magazines that friends and the mail dropped off.  Some are travel magazines, and I’m looking forward to the day where I can feel confident enough to plan my next vacation.  To where?  Who knows. 

So that’s it for this snowy Saturday.

Steer clear of me right now.  You’ve been warned!

Let’s just say that the visit to the surgeon didn’t quite go as I would have liked.  In short, he removed the right drain but left the left one in place because the drainage output was still a tad too high.

It does feel good to be rid of the one tube and bag, but I’ll have to admit that I’m not thrilled about having the other one still in me.  It’s such a pain in the ass to maneuver with (I hooked the hose not once but twice on doorknobs today and cursed like a sailor–loud and long).

The plan?  Keep monitoring the output through the weekend and into early next week.  When he sees numbers that he likes, he’ll bring me back in to have the drainage tube removed.

I did ask, “What if the volumes don’t go down?”  The first part of his response was that time is on our side; I just need to be patient.  But the second part was something along the lines of, “I’ve never had to go back into someone, but…”  So it’s a possibility that, if this doesn’t diminish on its own, that I may have to go back in for a follow-up surgery to correct the problem.  That would suck.

One other thing that he did do during the visit was draw blood for my first post-surgery PSA test.  Again, if the results come back at zero or nearly so, that’s a strong indicator that I’m cancer-free.  If they’re higher, then that’s a whole new ball game.

This PSA test was originally scheduled for next Thursday, but he thought he would do it while I was there.  I suppose I could learn the results as early as late Monday or Tuesday.

I will admit that it does feel better to be rid of one hose and the large dressing they had over both.  It does make going to the bathroom a little easier.

Heck, I’ve had tubes coming out of my body for 28 of the last 33 days.

I did drive myself to Cincinnati for the appointment.  The drive went well and it was good to be out of the house again.  I stopped by Kroger and CVS on the way home to stock up on some groceries and renew my prescription. 

The day started with a call from the surgeon checking on the drainage output.  He was satisfied enough to tell me to come in tomorrow, Friday, to have the drains removed.  Needless to say, I’m pretty excited about that.  I just hope that nothing happens after they’re out that causes any problems.

It was a pretty quiet day around the house.  I was able to throw another load of laundry in the wash, clean up the kitchen and bathrooms a little, and repeat my lazy cat impersonation, sitting in the sunny window watching the snow on my driveway melt for about an hour.  Exciting, eh?

You would think that with all this time on my hands, I’d be coming up with some profound, philosophical thoughts about this whole experience, but I got nothing.  Maybe when we get the first PSA results next week.