There really isn’t much to report today.  I spent a good portion of the day just organizing things around the house–clearing all the post-surgery stuff from the bathroom; filing medical bills and statements; taking the trash out (for the first time in three weeks!); running a load of laundry.

After having a good incontinence day yesterday, I shed the full-blown Depends and opted for the guards in the underwear today.  No problems so far; just the occasional stress incontinence.

I shared (in spreadsheet chart format, of course) my drainage numbers with the surgeon today.  He was pleased that they’re moving in the right direction, but wants to keep the drains in through the weekend and to call him Monday morning. 

That’s okay, I guess. They’re more a nuisance than anything else, but if they help get all that bad “juice” out of me–along with the antibiotics–I can tolerate them for three or four more days.

He asked how the incontinence was going and when I told him that I was in underwear with guards, he was pretty amazed given that the catheter came out two weeks ago tomorrow.  He was very pleased with that, so that’s a reassuring sign.

So that’s about it.  The last of my W-2’s arrived in the mail today, so maybe I’ll begin working on my taxes while I’m still sporting the drains this weekend.

Simple Gift #1:

OMG.  What a difference a real shower makes!!

The nurses wouldn’t let me take a shower with the dressing over my drain outlets (even though it’s covered in plastic), so I asked the surgeon as he discharged me and he said it wouldn’t be a problem.  So this morning, just to be extra protective, I grabbed a gallon Ziploc bag, taped it over my abdomen where the dressing was, and stood under hot, streaming water for about 15 minutes.  Heaven.

Simple Gift #3:

Sleep in my own bed.

My first night home was a good one.  It was a lot easier to figure out what to do with my drainage bags that I thought it would be.  I just created a little nest with an old towel on the mattress beside me, and the tubes leading to the bags are long enough where it worked out just fine.  (These bags operate on a vacuum system and don’t rely on gravity to drain, so they bags can be at the same level as my pelvis.)

I was able to sleep quite soundly and only ran to the bathroom twice in the middle of the night compared to about once every 60-90 minutes in the hospital (I guess without the IV fluids, there was less to void.) 

A great rendition of the old Shaker song:

Finally, I think I hit one of my lowest moments in this whole experience a couple of nights ago in the hospital.

I had turned out the lights at 10 PM and managed to fall into a deep sleep very quickly.  The urge to pee hit me, so I started my 10-step process to get to the commode.  When I got to step six, stand up, I instantly started filling my diaper with one of the hardest and strongest streams that I had felt since being admitted.  And it kept on to the point where the diaper overflowed and pee was running down my leg onto the tile floor and my little hospital booties.  And there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.  Nothing.

I called the nurse and she got me and the room cleaned up.  When I looked at the clock, I was astonished to see that it was 10:50 PM.  I had only slept 50 minutes when this happened.

About two hours later, the urge hit again.  I vowed not to have a repeat experience and made it to the bathroom.

Just as I sat on the commode–and before I could get “things” aimed in the right direction, the damn burst again and I’m peeing on my hand, the toilet seat, in the bowl, on the floor. 

That was it.  That was the low point of this whole experience.

The nurse was extremely compassionate and listened attentively as I vented my anger and frustration. She reminded me that the pockets of infected fluid were putting so much pressure on my bladder that it’s no wonder that I couldn’t control it.  

At one point during one of the episodes, I barked out, “Where the hell is all this coming from??”  She reminded me about the IV fluids being introduced into my body as one source.  The next morning, she talked to the doctor and, because the fever had broken, he agreed to take me off the IV fluids altogether.  That helped considerably.

In the day that I’ve been out of the hospital, the incontinence issues have been only minor–occasional stress squirts–so I hope the days of peeing down my leg are well behind me.  I think they are.

When telling the surgeon about this, he said that guys don’t realize that the weeks after the catheter being removed is the worst part of the whole experience.  He described what most go through, and based on his description of where most guys are at at this point, I really do feel as though I’m ahead of the curve.

Still, he said that regaining continence is like riding a sine curve–there will be ups and downs. 

I just want to be confident that I’m not going to stand up in a staff meeting and have a major incident, or that I’ll have enough time to walk between my office and the nearest men’s room.  I’m not sure when that will be.  Soon, I hope.

Yes, I’m home.

I was discharged late this afternoon and arrived home about an hour ago, thanks to the chauffeur services of a friend.

I spent a little bit of time getting the stinking black bananas out of the kitchen and organizing after my five day absence. 

The drainage bags that I was given are the same kind that I had for the surgery itself–a small, football-shaped plastic container that’s slightly larger in size that a large lemon.  They fit nicely into the pockets of my sweat pants, so getting around the house will be much easier than I expected.  Sleeping, however, might be another story.

The large bags clipped to the bed linen away from my body.  I’ll have to figure out a way to keep these smaller contained away from me so I don’t roll onto them during my sleep.

One thing that I need to do before going to bed is create my fluid output rate spreadsheet.  Those numbers will determine when the drainage bags come out.

Hopefully I’ll be up for a more detailed update tomorrow.  G’night! 🙂

today was a really good day.  my temperature was near normal the whole day.

the surgeon stopped by early this morning to check on me.  we reconfirmed that we wait on the culture results and how the fluid is draining before we make a decision on the next step.

i was able to spend a good part of the day walking the halls, entertaining the staff.  in the afternoon, i was liberated from my iv for four hours until the next antibiotic treatment.  no more iv fluids to overtax my beat up bladder.

i should know more about what is next when i see the surgeon tomorrow.  he  was here at seven today and around eleven a couple of days ago.  it appears his schedule is anything but routine.

more when i know it.

today was a much better day.

it started with not having a fever and got better when i got out of bed.  up until today, every time i stood up, i would instantly void my bladder into my diaper.  today, that did not happen.

the fluid that was drained was putting so much pressure on my bladder that there was no way i could control it.  now with the fluid gone, i can.  and that made my day.

i still have the occasional stress squirt, and that is okay for now.

my temperature has been at or below normal all day long.

my surgeon wants to wait for the culture results before making any decision about discharging me.  i may have to have another ct scan to confirm that the fluid is gone.

mybest guess is that i will spend monday night here.  things are looking up.

The day started with a bit of confusion.  My nurse said that the team that normally performs the procedure to drain the fluid does not work on the weekends and that I would have to wait until Monday.  She did not realize that my surgeon had made a special request to have them here today.

The procedure was quick and easy.  I was awake throughout, interacting with the team.  They installed two drainage tubes with separate drainage bags.  More hardware to lug around.

This evening, three visitors popped in for an hour and a half or so.

We will learn more of what the next steps are tomorrow.  if i were to guess, i would say that they chances of me still being here on Monday are good.

so i had my ct scan this  evening and it showed a build up of lymph fluid from where the lymph nodes were removed.  they will do a pro@edure tomorrow to drain the fluid and install a drain.  they will use a ct scan to guide the needle to drain the fluid.  i should expect to be here at least one more day, maybe longer.

i am back in good sam and will be admitted while they try to figure out the cause of my fever.  they will keep me until i am fever free for twenty four hours.  fun.

This morning I woke up with chills and a fever that hovered between 100.4° and 101.6°.  The surgeon has ordered me to return to the hospital so we can figure out why.  He even thought that there would be good chance that I’d be readmitted for observation.

I’ll try to let you know what’s going on as the day progresses.

So I’ve been itching for the last 24 hours.

First, there’s all the incision points.  They’re healing nicely but a couple of them have a nice scab over them that I just want to scratch right off.  They’re driving me nuts.  Of course, I won’t.  I’ll just leave them heal on their own.  It will be faster that way.

Second, there’s the body hair that’s regrowing where they shaved me prior to the surgery.  That stubble–in places where stubble should never be–also itches like crazy.  (By the way…  Just how do you get that job of body hair shaver?  Are you the lowest resident or nurse on the totem pole?  Did you draw a short straw or lose a bet? I don’t know.)

Finally, I’ve been itching to get out of the house, so I did.  I busted loose.  Escaped.

After paying a couple of bills yesterday, I realized that I was down to a couple of postage stamps left, so I hopped (well, not so much hopped–gently eased myself) into my truck and drove the 8 blocks or so to the post office.

With the forecast of snow, I also headed to Kroger to pick up a few things–loaf of bread, fresh fruit, freezer containers, juice.  Nothing much.

The trip lasted about 45 minutes, and that was just about the most I could handle.  I wasn’t my usual speed demon through the aisles of the store; I took it at a much slower pace.  I was very careful getting in and out of the truck and carrying the bags into the house.  All in all, it was a successful trip.  Except for one thing.

When I returned home and put the groceries on the kitchen counter, I noticed that I forgot to bring my Cialis prescription to the pharmancy.  I’ve got enough pills to get me to Friday night (take one per day).  Because of the snow, I went back to the pharmacy this afternoon to refill it. 

The surgeon’s office forewarned me that it’s not likely that my insurance would pay for it, and they were mostly right.  Interestingly, my insurance will pay for 6 of the 30 pills.  Odd.  I’ll have to do a cost-benefit analysis to see if having the ability to “sport wood” is worth $140 a month.  I know it’s important to take it regularly to reestablish that functionality, and once it’s reestablished, I may be able to cut back on the chemical assist.

There were a few snowflakes landing on my windshield as I left the pharmacy.

GRAPHIC BIOLOGY AHEAD:

As far as the incontinence goes, it’s about the same.  It really only seems to happen when I stand (although when I took a couple of steps in a parking lot, I felt a tiny squirt), but not every time that I stand.

One thing that concerns me a little.  Early on, when I would stand, I would contract my floor muscles and that seemed to be doing the trick.  Now, that seems to be less effective.

I only got up twice last night to use the bathroom (I’m cutting back my fluid intake shortly after dinner).  The second time was a close call.  I hung on almost too long.  Interestingly, as one of my fellow prostate cancer survivors told me, I was astonished at how quickly I can drain a full bladder now.  It took somewhere between 5 and 10 seconds and that was it.  Done. 

Finally, back to the itching theme…  I was told when I got the catheter out to expect an itching or burning sensation in my urethra, and I do, especially after urinating.  But there are other times it occurs, too, and that itching tells my brain it’s time to drain my bladder even when it really doesn’t need to be.  It’s frustrating trying to combat that sensation while trying to retrain my muscles.